Impostor Syndrome 1-2-3s

Impostor Syndrome 123s come up in virtually every conversation I’ve ever had with a leader.

What is it? Impostor syndrome is a psychological experience in which an individual doubts their accomplishments or talents and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".

The 123s

#1 Everyone has it or has had it.

#2 Everyone cycles through some form of 'It's just me.' (So, we definitely don't talk about it.)

#3 The higher and farther we go in a career, the more acutely Impostor Syndrome is felt.

How does this happen and why do we stay quiet about it…

First, think back to your first promotion. You went from being on a team of newbies to somehow managing the newbies. Soon enough, a decision needed to be made and your fellow newbie colleagues look at you for the answer. You’re like.. ‘Heck if I know. I'm just like you guys! ‘ Everyone laughs but they're still looking straight at you for the answer.

So, you decide what to do and off they go as you sit in a mildly cold sweat about what the 'right' answer was supposed to be and how in the world they mistook you for the adult in the room.

Second, With every promotion, expectations are higher and stakes are greater so there's farther to fall if you are 'found out'.

Finally, - the more responsibility we're handed as a leader usually involves hard, fast-moving, complex situations, trade-offs, and decision paths that don't have 'right' answers or any playbook for success. This uncertainty can open room for painful self-doubt and perpetual striving to keep proving ourselves so we aren’t exposed.

What To Do… Next time you're in a meeting, soften your gaze. Consider that every person at that table has wrangled with Impostor Syndrome. It brings in some humanity and relief, breathing a little deeper and settling the nervous system. The amazing thing is that settling the nervous system brings forth our highest executive brain functioning where we tap into creativity, better problem-solving, trust-building behaviors and enhanced decision-making - the very foundations of powerfully authentic and compelling leadership. Paradoxically, accepting and acknowledging Impostor Syndrome can actually make us a better leader.

"The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I change." ~~Carl Rogers